I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
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