i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize