Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
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It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
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And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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