I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I'm both gender and math confused
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
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