I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
