I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
