I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Randomize