Texts From Last Night

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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.

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  (832): I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store. http://tfl.nu/hql1
  Replies (14) Good night (1357) Bad night (517)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  How did people poop without Blackberrys?

  (416): View more from Ontario

  Motorola Razers?

  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  Stone age, man.

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  (902): How did people poop without Blackberrys? (416): Motorola Razers? (902): Stone age, man. http://tfl.nu/a751
  Replies (53) Good night (4222) Bad night (856)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off

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  (570): A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off http://tfl.nu/1xmy
  Replies (13) Good night (6655) Bad night (1114)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve

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  (702): oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve http://tfl.nu/2910
  Replies (29) Good night (6039) Bad night (635)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.

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  (801): He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face. http://tfl.nu/vz1o
  Replies (79) Good night (8823) Bad night (3047)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex

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  (727): she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex http://tfl.nu/jq0b
  Replies (12) Good night (7640) Bad night (945)
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..

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  (601): Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store.. http://tfl.nu/p81s
  Replies (9) Good night (2369) Bad night (811)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels

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  (803): He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels http://tfl.nu/4za8
  Replies (9) Good night (639) Bad night (1619)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are

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  (773): Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are http://tfl.nu/he1z
  Replies (6) Good night (881) Bad night (790)
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her

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  (312): This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her http://tfl.nu/f7pk
  Replies (4) Good night (734) Bad night (562)
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  (705): View more from Ontario

  We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.

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  (705): We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman. http://tfl.nu/hp7f
  Replies (0) Good night (870) Bad night (299)
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  (951): View more from California

  I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card

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  (951): I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card http://tfl.nu/akau
  Replies (2) Good night (592) Bad night (292)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk

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  (412): You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk http://tfl.nu/zmxc
  Replies (1) Good night (520) Bad night (220)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.

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  (703): I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT. http://tfl.nu/cx57
  Replies (1) Good night (311) Bad night (411)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.

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  (713): Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar. http://tfl.nu/aeu2
  Replies (6) Good night (489) Bad night (296)

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