how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
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