Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
