I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Randomize
