can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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