it hurts more in the daytime
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
two words: eviction party
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
