Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
She's the barista slut.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize