Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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