Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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