He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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