Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
You just made me feel so damn special
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
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