i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
