you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
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I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
Well I just put wine in my tea
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.