"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
