so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
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