What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I wish you could order shots online.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
