Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
