did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
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We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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