if i can run in heels then i can drive
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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