He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
