everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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