i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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