I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Randomize
