I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
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Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
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