I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize