so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Randomize
