pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
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I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
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Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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