Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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