Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
