This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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