we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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