"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
