We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Randomize
