man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
