is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
It's no shave November. This is our time.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
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