No stitches, just platelets and will power
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Randomize
