how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
