I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Randomize
