feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
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