im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
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