i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize
