So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
