haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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