i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
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